"how can u be so dumb to write that review?! din u think of the impact?! you are always saying u r street smart but apparently it's all bullshit... u din think at all! u criticise others for not thinking or for being dumb but look who turned out to be the biggest ass! i hate u and wish u were not born! what good has ur existence brought to others? nothing much, really!!!"
am very angry and upset with myself... i ought to go into seclusion and reflect on my actions... i wont mind if i suffer the conseqences for my actions but when it comes to my close pals suffering the consequences for my actions i will be terribly upset and angry with myself because i always pride myself in thinking and considering for others... i come down very hard on myself even though what i have done is not intentional and had good intentions to begin with... it's stupidity in the highest form... it feels worse when your close pal doesnt chide or scold u for it... i wish he did but knowing him, it is not his nature to do so even if he feels upset over it, he wld be thinking "wah lao how can she write such tt which i told her in confidence"... i hate myself, i dont know why i din think of the impact or consequences... maybe it's retribution for condemning too many pple, whatever it is, i feel like shit now... i know some of you care enough and would ask me what did i do to warrant such strong feelings but at this pt in time, i dont think i can handle telling some of u abt it... i was chided n lectured by dragon when i told him and i dont think i will be comforted with a patronising "oh, but it should be ok lah since he doesnt blame u"
i'm one who feels very strongly when it comes to disappointing my close pals, they dont deserve this kind of crap from me...
"i owe u and hope i can make up for the wrongs i did..."